08 June 2003 - 11:18 p.m.

I've been working like crazy for the last week. I think I'm going slightly insane. Or maybe I AM slightly insane and it's just manifesting itself while I'm exhausted and stressed. I love my jobs though. I seriously should not complain. I get to work with the world's best people. And Alison.

I've tricked people into thinking I'm quasi funny. I'm not really funny. I am a smart ass mostly. And I whine. A lot. Apparently, in some social circles this passes as humour.

I watched the Anne Lamott documentary that Ali's mom taped for me. It made me cry and laugh out loud. I want to be a writer suddenly. Mostly because I want Anne Lamott to teach me how to write. I think my favourite thing about her is that she makes me feel okay. Not like I'm a good person, or that I'm sane, or happy, or smart, or right ... but that I'm okay. She's absolutely as neurotic as me ... and as tired and cranky and sad and lonely and happy and hopeful as me. She's a crazy liberal like me. And her faith is really inspirational (as is the fact that she believes God still loves her when she says she's never going to speak to Him again after something bad happens). And she's not all about being happy all the time ... but she's so grateful and positive and inspirational in this bizarely cynical way. And I realize that she's my hero and I want to be her friend. When I met her this fall, I cried ... I was so happy I literally was speechless when she signed my book. For those of you who know me well, I am not normally speechless.

Session starts this week ... which is crazy ... and exciting.

Enough whining ...

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